I’m 33 today. I got a few wrinkles, permanent eyebags and white hairs hiding among the purple.
Age is just a number. Apart from my looks, questionable health, being sleepy at 9pm, I do feel younger. Maybe it comes from acting too old for my age in my youth. My mother did tell me multiple times that since birth, I have always been in a rush to get ahead. I was originally due on Christmas Day.
I watched too many Calvento files and Days of Our Lives episodes as a kid. I may have started liking boys at too young an age.
I became competitive with my studies, quiz bees, sports, research contests, joining the next cool company. In many ways, I’ve felt like I was pushing myself to do things an older wiser person would do.
Then, my body started feeling older. I got hitched. I have a kid. The universe doesn’t $@#*% slow down. Thank goodness my experience with anxiety and depression taught me this cool trick of focusing on what I can control.
I feel younger because I’ve learned that I may not be able to stop time and &@$! hitting the fan but I can choose to slow the $@#*% down.
Dear Tita Ninang Den,
The first time you took care of me, you didn’t have prior childcare experience. Grandma showed you how to hold me, feed me, change my diaper and get me to sleep. While Mama Bear only gave you one simple rule: “Don’t drop the baby.”
In less than 4 months, with very little guidance (because Mama Bear is also new to all this) you’ve become an expert babysitter. You looked after me while my parents worked or rested. But you did more than just keep me satisfied with food, naps, clean diapers and play time. You serenaded me, read me books, helped me prep for my baptism (by playing coffee shop background noise for me every day so that people wouldn’t scare me so much on the big day – and it worked). You took awesome photos and videos of me that I hope to look at when I get older.
You sat next to my carseat and made sure I didn’t get cranky during car rides. You sacrificed a lot of sleep so that you can have time to both work and look after me.
You’ve been such a big help to Mama Bear and Papa Bear during this tough transition period of having their first kid.
Now that you’re back in the Philippines, I miss you. My days are not the same without you. But don’t worry, Mama Bear is trying her best and I am still the happy baby you know.
I love you, okay? Please take good care of yourself. Thank you for all you’ve done for me so far and for all I’m sure you’ll do to stay a huge part of my life.
Happy, happy Birthday!
See you later!
When we were kids, my older sister and I didn’t used to get along as well as we do now. But mostly because she was the responsible no-BS eldest child who expected a lot more from me, the immature BS-loving middle child.
As we got older, we did end up having more things in common and I guess my maturity had somewhat (maybe) caught up with hers. I value and respect her a lot more now… for everything she’s been and everything she’s become. If there is anything I admire the most about her, it would be how she goes after what she wants. I think it’s what made her very successful in her career, personal life and various interests.
To my Ate, I was such a punk to you when we were younger even when you were just trying to teach me to grow up. But I love you and thank you for being someone I could look up to. Happy Birthday and I wish you an even more awesome life!