Why your Mother is a B


I grew up in a culture that highly values saying “Yes”. There is a popular Filipino saying: “Kapag gusto, may paraan. Kapag ayaw, maraming dahilan” which basically means if there’s a will, there’s a way and where there’s no will, there’s nothing but excuses.

I’m all for finding solutions. And up until the more recent years of my life, my can-do attitude has led me to believe that saying “No” is a bad thing. There is always a way, I can always take on more.

Baby, you are making me a lot better at saying “No” and I don’t care if it comes off wrong. Some people will abuse your can-do attitude and your willingness to help. When you choose to not enable their behavior by saying “No”, the same people might dislike you or call you names behind your back.

I don’t mind being a B anymore. Doing what’s right is more important than being liked. It’s better to say “No” than to make commitments you can’t keep. It’s better to say “No” than to do something that contradicts your values.

I want you to have a mother that can say “No” and in the future, teach you to say “No” when required by the situation. I enjoy learning by testing my limits but I need to find balance and do a better job of looking after myself, looking after us.